


Green eyes

by nakadoo



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Multi, Ramblings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-01
Updated: 2012-08-01
Packaged: 2017-11-11 04:54:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/474747
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nakadoo/pseuds/nakadoo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>We all have our internal monsters. Dirk's just so happens to have green eyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Green eyes

It was needless, he knew that, but he was only human and could not help himself when the green-eyed monster reared its ugly face and ensnared him within the depths of its trap. He has yet to find a way out of said trap but has found solace in pretending that he was in a place where there were other things to hold his interest.

He had hobbies and responsibilities to keep him occupied both mind and body and it helped him keep the monster in check; helped him to forget that he was in a nasty trap and in a place much more enjoyable.

However, he could never escape. There was always the dark recesses in the back of his mind that constantly reminded him that he would never be satisfied and would forever be in a self-loathing that maybe no one would understand. Perhaps he was being melodramatic, trapped not only in the depths of the trap of a monster but also in the throes of teenage hormones and petty angst. He was hoping it was a phase, a disgusting phase that he’d leave behind once he’s shed himself of the vexing quirks that came with being a teenager.

How he so wished to be a little older, a little wiser and a little more in control of his feelings.

He supposed he was nearly there, and how he wished he was already there.

Envy is a horrible thing, as is contempt especially towards those he held dear. But how could he not feel this way? How could he when it was plain as day that he’d never get what he wants, no matter how hard he tried? It was like swimming against the waves of a sea in the midst of a storm: near impossible unless he held some sort of unearthly powers that he highly doubted.

And yet he was torn; he loved her like a sister, he loved him like no other.

His only solace, to his chagrin, was from a more often than not recumbent girl miles away from him. Yet he found her charming, sweet and dear despite her equivocal and boisterous demeanor and accepted her into his life. Though, he knew well, that she could never usurp the throne of his prince over his heart despite the warm smiles and loving stares through the horrible qualities of their webcams. She however, knew this well and dared not bring it up, lest she wanted to uproot a whole new world of problems that neither of them are ready or willing to face.

So she keeps quiet and eggs him on, abetting him, giving him tips she thought useful and he, being consumed with jealousy and scorn thought that he might as well give into selfishness as well.

He’s far gone now, into the ardent arms of the green-eyed monster called jealousy and lives uncomfortably in masks and lies and he supposes that this is the way it has to be.

Karma’s a bitch.

**Author's Note:**

> Vent writing. I'm far from my happy place, I'm afraid.


End file.
